What happens to a company’s image, brand and stock price when the news gets out that it foreclosed on a farm, evicted the owner, and made no provisions for taking care of the animals?

That’s what Wells Fargo did in Rhode Island, according to the the Providence (RI) Journal (via Consumerist, who incorrectly reported that it was an animal shelter rather than a farm).

Wells Fargo claims it arranged for the Rhode Island Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals take care of the 130+ cats, dogs, chickens, pigs, horses, sheep, goats. Not so, says RISPCA. According to its president Ernest Finocchio, the bank said it didn’t want RISPCA’s help.

An inspection yesterday revealed that some animals had no food or water. Others had been carted off by strangers – hopefully for humanitarian reasons.

“Two llamas are gone. A turkey is gone. Some waterfowl have left, as well as a number of pot-bellied pigs. I don’t know where the animals went, or who took them. I saw people walking around the farm yesterday and have no idea who they were,” said Finocchio.

But wait a minute. The bank isn’t the only bad guy here. Foreclosure laws require multiple eviction notices, so the farmer himself knew a long time ago that trouble was brewing, yet made no plans for taking care of his animals. Mucho bad karma for him.

UPDATE: Wells Fargo says hey, it wasn’t us who foreclosed– it was them, that mortgage company. But we’ll do the right thing and take care of the animals. Actually, it’s the Rhode Island Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals that’s assuming care, according to the Los Angeles Times.

Despite hearing a lot of hype about it, even from people I like and respect, I have been a huge Twitter skeptic. I perceived it as an enormous time-sink with little or no value, except maybe self-gratification. (No, not that kind!) That was until I finally took the time to actually visit the site yesterday. Wow, amazing people and ideas flying around there. Fun, too.

Now my problem is, how do I get any work done? Being a twit (hmm, that’s probably not the right term, is it?) is a lot more fun than actually working!

Shameless plug: Follow me at @tom_mckay

How bad is the auto business? So bad that a dealer in Europe is offering two-for-one: Buy one car, get a second one free.

How can he afford it? Distributors in southern Europe have been so desperate to get cars off their lots that they were selling them at huge discounts.

From a marketing standpoint, two-for-one is far better than simply cutting the price of the first car. Helps alleviate overcrowding on the lot, too. And all the publicity he’s getting for this stunt doesn’t hurt, either.

But is it working?

Cardoen’s eight showrooms had seen more than 10 times their usual number of visitors since the promotion began. “People have been coming in from all over Belgium and abroad,” said Cardoen’s Commercial Director Ivo Willems.

So people are coming in to kick the tires, and maybe stare at the crazy person who’s giving away free cars. But are they actually buying any? Um, not yet. Willems admits they’ve yet to see an impact on sales.

But at least they’re trying something new. And wisely using free publicity to spread the word. How is your business coping with the economic crisis?

When is a complaint letter like a sales letter? When it gets the immediate, affirmative response you’re looking for. Take the letter “professional complaint letter writer” Bruce Silverman wrote to the Ritz-Carlton that ended up getting him a week, totally comped, at the company’s Kapalua in Hawaii.

As today’s Consumerist detailed, Silverman has been amazingly successful in getting companies to give him all sorts of free stuff: First class upgrades, hotel room upgrades (how does a free week in the Presidential Suite sound?), hundreds of dollars in cash — all from his way with words.

Silverman has now written a book filled with advice for complaining. The basic technique isn’t too far off from the way to write an effective sales letter. Basically his advice is:

1. Make the opening of your complaint letter personable and personal. Hook their interest.
2. Praise first before you explain why you’re dissatisfied.
3. Keep it brief. The reader is busy and easily distracted.
4. Be reasonable — don’t ask for the moon.
5. Make it clear you haven’t written them off, that you pl;an to be customers again in the future, and that you would welcome some sort of compensation.

As the Consumerist put it, “It’s really just an artful way of demonstrating the basic principle of “it will cost more to ignore me than to take care of my problem.”

Check it out. It’s a fun read. And it may get you what you want next time you’re wronged.

Yes, an Australian newspaper is giving away at an all-expenses-paid divorce.

The lucky ex-couple also gets a TV and a Playstation — which I suppose could result in a custody battle.